Darkness--but not in a grim way

 The other night, I got home kind of late (really late) so you can imagine my surprise at seeing 2 power company trucks in the parking lot outside of my building. I didn't worry too much, because the lights were on in some of the other apartments in my building and the power was on when I got inside mine. 

It was even later (yes. I got home late, and then it was a couple of hours before I went to bed) that the power did go out. I mean, on the plus side, normally I don't really need power at 2 am, so it was thoughtful of the power company to do whatever they were doing then. Also, kids, this is why you should go to bed on time.

Anyway, because I was delinquent and still up, I got to see just how dark everything was with the power out. I mean, I have noticed that my place never seems to get super dark, but with all the power off--no lights from plugs or clocks or chargers or anything--WOW!!! It was actually dark!!!!! I kind of loved it!

I don't really have a moral of the story, other than I should try to get my place darker at night, but I'm sure you could find some deep meaning in there if you really looked for it. I, however, am not going to. My purpose with sharing this fun little anecdote (which was, I never knew how much darker my room could get!) is completed. The end.

Snow

 

Bucket list

Simple things that are worth experiencing in life:

• Hazy sunlight breaking through the mountains
• A Lego lover going to a Lego store for the first time
• A toddler's laughter
• Christmas lights shining through snow
• Being loved by a dog
• Giving someone the perfect gift
• Doing something unexpected and surprising people
• Traveling somewhere you've never been
• Unleashing your inner 5-year old
• Teaching a baby to walk
• Creating something (art, music, photographs, writing, food, whatever you want)
• Laying in bed listening to rain
• Sleeping in
• Solving a problem

Crazy Ball: Another game from the minds of kids

Required equipment: 

• open space
• at least 2 balls
• players
• 1 umperor
• Recommended but optional--slick pants

How to play:

Players 'bowl' balls along the floor trying to get their ball into other players' corners. Players defend their corners from balls.

If a ball hits the wall of another player's corner, that is a Yay. And everyone says, "Yay." If a ball hits a player, it's an ouch. If a ball hits another ball, it's a "Woo-woo". If two balls hit the same wall/object, it is a hooray. If a ball manages to bounce off of three things, it's a "Hip hooray". 

It is not required to have one ball per player. 

There are no points. The idea is just to create chaos, really.

Additional phrases can be added as players choose. 

The umperor starts and pauses play as needed. 

You can also have a wandering interruption on the court, when a non-player moseys onto the playing field. Just for kicks. 

It's easy to learn, easy to play, and plenty of laughs. So, grab your gear and have some fun!

Holiday speedbump

I like Thanksgiving. I really do. But for some reason, this year I just want to jump straight to the Christmas season. 

I don't really know why. It's a good time with family and good food and time off work. And Christmas right around the corner. But I'm so in the mood for the Christmas season. I'm ready for the lights and the trees and the music and the cold--preferably snow. I really want snow. And more time off and time with family and the fun of gift-giving (which I really do enjoy). 

And the good news is that it's almost here. And it will be fun and then Christmas. But it does feel like it's been a long time coming. And simultaneously, how can it possibly be here?

Yep. Time is just wacky.

Interruptions

I have a bookshelf I've been working on staining, varnishing, and assembling since around August. And I have these moments where I sit back and think, "How is this thing not done yet?!" I mean, seriously. How has it taken me so long?

Well, the answer is "interruptions." My life has been full of them. I swear, my day never goes as planned and I acknowledge that at least some of this is on me, but so much of it is stuff just happens. Too much work, so I stay late which means less time for projects at home. (And that's the number one reason why stuff isn't getting done right now. The work-life balance is a little not there). People needing things suddenly, shifting all the priorities for the day. An unexpected phone call--which I am notoriously bad at keeping short. 

It's also not helpful that my brain feels like mush, so by the end of a workday, I'm not at any kind of capacity. And I think everyone is feeling tired. At least, all the surveys I've done have confirmed that conclusion. Which is also not helping in the productivity department. 

But at some point, I will get that shelf done. And I'm optimistic that I will get that at some point, I'll even get a little more together and actually get some things done. Because one can dream.

 

What time is it?

Every now and then, my tendency to delay actually works in my favor. Like this morning. When I forgot that it was daylight savings (why is this still a thing?) and so didn't change my clock last night. And, slept in a bit late. Which I should regret, but honestly, it was lovely and this is possibly part of why I am not making much progress towards having a more regular sleep schedule because seriously, it is always so much nicer to stay in bed than to get out of it. Anyway, it ended up working out because it means I didn't show up at church an hour early and very confused. 

Also, I just want to say that the google newsfeed failed big time. Why on earth are they showing me articles about daylight savings time AFTER it happens? And this is why I question the intelligence of artificial intelligence. 

Talk less, smile more

If you were at anyway up on the Hamilton craze, you'll probably recognize "Talk less, smile more" as the lyrics from one of the songs. It's a line Burr says when introduced to Hamilton, and I think in the musical, the line gets a bad rap. 

In reality, this is some of the best advice out there. A solid majority (by a landslide) of my goofs in life are the result of me talking more, and usually smiling less while I do it. Many of my real regrets stem from not talking less and smiling more. And the times when I've handled things right, it's because I have talked less and smiled more. And by initially talking less, I've given myself time to learn more, so that when I did talk I was able to have more of an impact. 

I have a friend that I worked who is really good at this talking less.  When things were really stressful at work, and there was very low morale, she held back. And when she did raise a concern--even in private conversations--you paid attention. Her expressions of concern were never personal or about personalities, and even though the situation was still rough, and her input wasn't shying away from that, it somehow made me feel less crazy. My mentor was the same way, as are many of the people that I deeply respect and admire and want to be like. And when I have managed to talk less and smile more--be more agreeable and personable--I have almost always learned something that helped me to have greater compassion and to become more tolerant and patient. I have almost always had my mind opened.

So, even though in Hamilton, Burr came across as double-crossing and devious, there is great value in talking less and smiling more. There are definitely times when you should firmly hold your ground, but you can do that even when talking less and smiling more. And I hope I get better and better at it. 

The Future, the Past, and the stuff in between

Yesterday was a rough day. Work basically sucked from start to finish, and I just want to say it seems a little unfair that people can cause so many problems for me when no one is even in the office.

After work I was checking the news on BBC, because I love the BBC, and they had a link to one of their reels that was titled "Physics suggests that the future has already happened". The clip was all about the theory of relativity, which was far less compelling than the title of the clip, because not gonna lie: at the end of the yesterday, I was super ready to be in the future if it had already happened. Or at least more in the future than I was yesterday. Even a sneak peek would be nice. Or maybe just depressing, because if it has already happened, that would imply it's too late to change things and depending on the future, that might just make me want to never get out of bed again. 

Fortunately, I don't believe the future has already happened (and that's not really what the video is saying anyway, because it's all about relativity, which is basically saying it's a matter of perspective). But I have had many times in my life when I wished I could just fast forward a bit. Like, job interviews or presentations or starting new jobs--I always wish that I could just be on the "done" side of it, where they are something well in the past. And I suspect that I'm like most people in that I wish the good things could linger a little longer. Then there are the times when I look at the calendar and think, "Wait! No! Rewind! I need more time for life!" 

All of which goes to show that time is really pretty ridiculous and, yeah, like Einstein says, probably pretty relative.  

Wacky Ball and other newly invented games

It's been another peak season for new games coming from the kid crowd, including this weekend's new release, Wacky Ball. It's easy to learn and while the regulation equipment may incur some cost, it's pretty easy to find substitutes.

Equipment needed:

1. Plastic bowling set (with 10 inch pins)

2. Pool noodles

3. 4 walls and a decently smooth floor. 

Recommended equipment:

Winter gloves

Knee pads

How to play:

Basically, you sit on the floor and try to hit the bowling ball past your opponent's pool noodle using a bowling pin. They try to block it and get it through yours. As the creator says, 'It's like bowling and hockey and ping-pong mixed together." 

Variations: You can use the extra pins as obstacles on the court. If you knock them down, you get a point and your opponent loses one. Or, vice versa. Whichever way you want to play. 

Other rules to know about: 

1. No touching the ball with your hands on purpose. Except for when you are getting it out of the goal area.

2. If the ball rolls back into the court after you hit it past the pool noodle, there is no point.

3. If the ball hits a wall, it's still in play. On some courts, there may be what is called a "dead zone"--a spot where the ball just can't be hit unless you bring it back onto the court (you can use your hands for this). Bring it back onto the court and put it in the middle and have a hit-off. 

4. If you accidentally hit the ball into your own goal, it is called an "incident" and doesn't count as a score.

5. If the ball goes into your goal, you get to hit the ball first on the next play.

And another note, if the ball jumps over the pool noodle, it is called a pop-shot. 

Another game that is trending can also use the plastic bowling balls from the bowling set. Basically, each player has a bowling ball (or other kinds of ball) and you are rolling them at each other and trying not to let them get past you. You can have as many players as you want, and you just keep the balls moving. No points, and I wasn't told whether a player gets out, but I doubt it. Mostly, the goal is to have maximum ball chaos.

Finally, a new sport is emerging: Olympic sliding. This takes playground slides to a whole new level. There are a variety of slide techniques, and it is crucial to stick the landing. There are also pairs and team events. While it's not yet an official Olympic sport, it's still early days, and don't be surprised if you hear your pre-schooler voice his dream of being an Olympic slider. 

Good news, bad news

Good news: The sore throat I've been having on and off for a month is almost certainly just sinus-related, and appears to be gone for good now.

Bad news: Now it's all draining out my nose, making it hard to breathe and really, who wants to wake up in the middle of the night because of a runny nose? Boy, I am tired.

*****

Bad news: The first leg of my return flight was canceled and the earliest they could reschedule me was for Thursday.

Good news: I found a flight with a different airline that would get me back yesterday.

Bad news: I'm decidedly behind at work, and not even kidding, my team totally changed while I was gone. It was 3 days!!!

Good news: No lives will be harmed because of this. Seriously. The probability that anyone's life will ever hang in the balance because of my job is really really slim.

*****

Good news: I got a new laptop at work. Which is mainly good news because now I don't have to worry about the old one overheating and exploding. (I've had to hard reboot it twice--with the little emergency reboot function hidden on the bottom of the laptop that I never knew existed.)

Bad news: I spent most of my day trying to set up the computer and still have the most essential program for my work that is not downloaded. Not great when I'm already inundated with work, but what can you do.

Good news: It should be up and running tomorrow, so no worries. Other than being behind on work. Which I blame on a tornado warning in Texas. What can you do. 

Bad news: 

And suddenly it's fall

Does anyone know how we got this far in the year? I know there's a one day at a time method and all, but has anyone checked to make sure that we're really getting all 24 hours? I feel like the universe's clockwork is just wonky. One day feels like it's 5 years long, and other days (usually on weekends, haha) seem to last 10 minutes. Or maybe I'm just getting old.

None of this is helped by the bizareness of the seasons these days. How am I supposed to gauge where we are at in the year when we have August temperatures in June, and June weather in September? 

I would also like to pin some blame on the greeting card and candy industries. I kind you not, I saw Thanksgiving cards and Halloween cards in the store at the end of August. Which, those are things? Are you kidding me? I am supposed to be sending people happy Halloween cards? Just, no. Although, it would boost post office business...

At any rate, here we are, with October starting tomorrow. And lovely fall weather, which I always enjoy. The mountains are turning red-orange-brown, which is always lovely. And at some point, I will close my windows and officially make my bed with blankets. Also, I have two trips coming up, one of which will involve hot air balloons and possibly a trip to the zoo, and the other a temple open house with family, huzzah!

And if the year seems like a blur, well, I think that's just the nature of mortality. So we're all good. 

In my lifetime

COVID-19 pandemic
Y2K
The internet for the masses
Google
Cell phones
9/11
Mt St Helens erupted
Challenger shuttle explosion
Fall of the Berlin Wall
Tiananmen Square
2 presidents impeached

Columbine and a bunch of other school/mass shootings

Gulf War

War on Terror

D.A.R.E. program

Hurricane Katrina

Reality TV (this is NOT my fault)

Social media (also not my fault)

Summer and winter Olympics being split into different years

First female Supreme Court justice

First female vice president

Arab Spring

Oklahoma City bombings

Indiana Jones franchise

Pixar

Black Lives Matter

Thriller (Michael Jackson)

Backstreet Boys and K-pop

Creation of MLK day

The Cosby Show

Nintendo and Mario Brothers

Minecraft

Michael Phelps

Florence Griffith Joyner 

Carl Lewis

Michael Jordan

MCU

Too many Batman's to count

Spell check

Princess Diana and Mother Teresa died

Chernobyl

Amazon

2008 crash

First black president

End of Apartheid

Harry Potter

CDs, DVDs, Blu-Ray, laser-disc

Full House and  TGIF lineup

Dolly the clone sheep

Lord of the Rings movies released

Occupy Wall Street

Brexit

Netflix and streaming

Office wars

We are going through a reorganization at work, and thus, relocations. In the first 4 years at my current job, I moved offices 5 times, so I've pretty much learned to not get attached. But, offices are strange things that end up meaning a lot to people. In some ways I get it. I work in a cubicle--a shared cubicle--at the moment, and sometimes, a little privacy would be nice. There are perks to a cubicle, but I get the desire for 4 walls that reach the ceiling and a door. 

Or course there are disadvantages to an office, as well. With great workspaces come great responsibilities. Also, offices can be a bit isolating sometimes, shut away from the masses. But, sometimes, that is exactly what I need at work. 

So, basically, at the end of the day office space is just office space, and you make it what you want it to be. And, it is not the hill I plan on dying in this lovely rat race we're in. But to each their own, and if an office is your thing, go for it. 

Rainbows and other pretty things

 

If life mimicked TV

 I've been watching a medical drama and it sure seems like patients are always unexpectedly going unconscious right as the doctor says everything is fine. Also, in the first season, the poor doctors couldn't go anywhere outside of work without running into people almost dying in the middle of the street. It's very similar to the murder mystery conundrum: the sleuth can't go anywhere without constantly encountering dead bodies.

Which got me thinking about what if this happened in real life in other professions? I'm an archivist, and my profession will (probably wisely) never have a TV drama series. And I do feel like I end up doing outreach for my job wherever I go, but my work duties aren't actually outreach. So, what if everywhere I went, I ran into people who needed their papers archived, stat? "Quick! I need my file cabinet arranged and described! Someone please help! Is there an archivist available?"

Or what if mail carriers were constantly running into people who needed packages delivered NOW? A grocer who, every time he left his house, ran into people needing produce and delivery trucks trying to transport cold cereal?

Or a farmer who ran into cows needing milked while riding the bus? Apple store employees constantly having to solve tech problems (oh, wait. That IS reality). Opticians running into people needing glasses, custodians always running into messes (probably also fairly realistic), sports announcers always ending up in the middle of a basketball game or tennis match having to announce (this could be pretty entertaining), or engineers having to construct bridges on their way to the movies? Accountants trying to have dinner with their spouse and getting interrupted by an emergency audit!

Thank goodness most professions don't run into life and death or any other emergencies outside of work. I, for one, would not cope well. (Thus, archivist). But it could be pretty entertaining. 

 

Back to normal?

Last week we were supposed to start working in the office again, like normal.* Except that half the people weren't there, which may have been because of some HR/director last-minute messaging about coming in that ended up being confusing, or because people are working hybrid schedules mashed up with 4 10s, 9 9s, or who knows what else, so honestly, it seems absurd to call it "back" to normal, because, well, not so much.

On Tuesday, though, we had a division meeting, and so lots of people were there, and we all wore our masks, and when we got out of the meeting, instead of just me and a couple of coworkers going back to our desks, it was a horde! I did NOT like it. There were far too many people. Oh, no, no, no. Not because of COVID. Just because I am more introverted and haven't had to share my space with anyone for 18 months-ish, and when I did go in the office, there was less than half the normal staff there. And I liked it that way. And now there are people everywhere, and I want them to go home! Or at least for me to just have my own little office hidden away in some corner where people forget about me until I emerge from the depths to go to a meeting or something.

Also, this mask thing. I don't have to wear one at my desk, but I do in public areas, but my desk is semi-public (it's a cubicle. I hope every business is really re-thinking the health and safety around cubicles at this point) and so it is a very blurry line between desk and public space and I keep forgetting because I haven't had to wear one, and basically, do we all feel like it's a Groundhog's Day scenario and we are back at last April? "Should I wear a mask? Is it safe to work? COVID is no big deal, or is it? What is going on?!?!?!" 

Yeah. So, we have gone back to that normal, but I think that isn't actually what we were shooting for.

Petrichor

I love rain. I love storms, with lots of rain and thunder and lightning. I love puddles and the sound of rain. And I love that rain smell--which has a name: petrichor. 

We got a lovely storm today. It wasn't nearly long enough, but it was a storm. And it had the sounds, and the clouds (I do love that dark grey sky!) and the smell and the thunder and lightning. It was a lovely way to wind down from an intense workday. 

And with any luck, there will be more tomorrow. Here's hoping!!

Construction here, construction there

Construction, construction, everywhere! 

I'm not even kidding. My city right now feels like someone decided to bulldoze and start over. 

My apartment complex, and the building next door, are being renovated. 

The major tourist attraction is being renovated and earthquake-proofed.

The convention center is being renovated and expanded. 

There are half a dozen high rise apartment buildings going up, probably in a 1-mile radius of me, not to count all the buildings everywhere outside of that.

And the roads! I don't know if someone just had a lot of spare concrete or something, but so many roads are being relaid. 

Everywhere I go, stuff is being built. Which feels weird, because 1) pandemic, and 2) it feels like the planet is burning down, and some part of my brain is saying, "This doesn't seem good for the planet." But, also, the old stuff wasn't good for the planet, so maybe the new stuff will be? It's all so complicated! Give me calculus over climate math any day!

Also, there is a real drawback to so much construction. When it rains, my car ends up covered in a layer of dust, instead of nicely cleaned. Although, we're in a drought, so that is less of a problem than I'd like it to be.

And for a while, there was a bug problem. I think all the building was disrupting the insects' homes, so they came and hung out with me for a while, but I must not have been very hospitable, because they haven't been around for a couple of months. Granted, smashing guests with a shoe is not hospitable, which means my messaging must have worked.

Anyway, mostly I'm tired of all the building. It makes no sense, because most of it doesn't directly affect me, but I'm still kind of tired of it being everywhere. So, maybe we could finish something for a change of pace?

The mountains are missing

 Last Thursday, the mountains disappeared.

Smoke from a huge fire almost 709 miles away moved into town and literally, the mountains vanished. Couldn't see them at all. And, while they aren't Macchu Picchu, these mountains aren't subtle, so for them to just vanish was quite the thing.

Also, how is it that smoke can travel 700 miles and still smell like something is burning?! I am impressed. It's a talent. (Not a fan, but yes, impressed). My friend and I swore that it had to be something local that was burning but nope. We checked multiple news reports and it was not a local fire. It really was just smoke from the west doing a tour. 

The smoke was so bad that we were encouraged not to leave home if we didn't have to. I did leave home, but even having spent a lot of time inside, it was still pretty obvious that there was a problem. 

Today it seems to be clearing up--I can see the mountains again, even though they are still hazy. So that's good. Maybe it will clear up in time for this week's meteor shower. And at least I'm only dealing with smoke. Somewhere, someone has to put up with the fire. And they definitely got the short end of the straw.

Sloth power

I'm not sure what the origins are, but in the last couple of years, I have started receiving a lot of sloth-related gifts. And I'm not going to lie, I am totally down with this development. I love pandas, especially when they play in snow, and elephants, and penguins, and many other animals, but there is DEFINITELY room for sloths. 

Also, sloths are an animal that absolutely resonates with me. I went to the aquarium this week, and of course checked in on the sloth. He (she?) was really active that day and actually exited his log for a minute or two. Gave a yawn. And then decided it just wasn't worth it and went back to bed. My kind of guy!

I have met lots of people who are the human equivalent of the Energizer Bunny. And, it's great. I'm glad there are a lot of go-getters and achievers out there. But I'm always flummoxed as to where they get all that energy from. Sloths are really my speed. And energy level, as a general rule.*

Like I say, I don't know how this sloth thing began. Maybe my people just know me. Or maybe I said something. Either way, the universe has worked together and nailed it. 

*Although I do not relate to their hygiene regimen.

Olympic joys

I have not been watching the Olympics very closely, partly because they just started, but also because I don't have normal TV, don't subscribe to the right streaming services, and Olympic coverage in the US is horrible.* But today I saw the headline that Tunisia had won the gold in the men's 400m freestyle and I had to check it out, because if I love anything, it's seeing someone completely shock first world countries and get a medal when they don't. That may be awful of me, but I'm telling you, if you watch Ahmed Hafnaoui react to winning, you also will feel pure joy and be glad that he won.

It wasn't a feeling of, "Ha, down with western capitalism" or any kind of anti-my-country sentiment. I'm happy when our athletes win, but I'm not overly competitive, so I'm generally pretty happy for anyone who works hard and wins. It was just seeing how excited and happy he was, and knowing how much it must mean to him and his family and his country, it is just impossible to not be elated.

Also, because I knew he won, I was super vested in his performance when I watched the race. You would think that knowing the outcome, there would be no tension watching it, but no. I was seriously on the edge of my seat, thinking, "Come on! Come on, you can do it!" And then reminding myself that, yes, yes he could because he DID. But I was still kind of stressing out about the outcome. Which, I find hilarious. 

I am a little disappointed that I can't find any other footage--nothing of him talking to reporters, nothing of the medal ceremony (the US coverage is really just not great**). But, maybe it will pop up in the next few days. At any rate, I now have a new video to add to my "This makes me so happy" watchlist. And, so much congratulations to Hafnaoui. Thank you for sharing your joy with the world, and well done on your win. 

*People, we need to get our act together and fix all the other problems--poverty, inequality, racism, all the isms, etc. so that we can finally protest how bad the Olympics are. And, won't that be an amazing world, when the biggest problem we have is bad Olympic coverage? I SUPER want to live in that world. Let's make it happen!
**Interesting side note: I found video of the event broadcast in Arabic. I do not understand a lick of Arabic, but they were saying his name from start to finish--a LOT. The US coverage, he got hardly any mentions until he won. Which was interesting, and confirmed to me that someone needs to run with my idea for a thesis/dissertation: study how the Olympics are covered in the media in different countries, and figure out what that tells us about the world. I think it would be fascinating. 

The friends

A while ago I was thinking about friendship. Not sure why, as is the case with most of the things I think about. Anyway, I was thinking about some of my dearest friends and I honestly don't remember how we became friends. 

I know how we met, the where and the circumstances that led to us meeting each other. But I don't remember how we went from strangers to close friends. And that is probably because, for me, friendship isn't instantaneous. So, there isn't going to be a moment when I say, "And now we are besties."

Personally, I think that it is wonderful that I can't recall the details of how I gained my friends. It's lovely and just how I like my friendships. But I think not everyone is like that. I think there are some people who decide after 5 minutes that you and they are going to be pals for life. 

For me, that is MASSIVELY stressful. I feel anxious just thinking about it. What's the rush? Let's just take a beat. And some of that is because, for me, I don't reveal my entire self in the first five minutes. So when someone decides after five minutes that they like me, my reaction is, "You know nothing about me. You love the facade me, who is polite and friendly in public. But that is NOT me."

Gasp! Horrors! Someone not revealing their true self on first acquaintance?! 

Yes. And furthermore, I have no shame about that fact. It's normal human behavior (I hope!!!) to put our best foot forward when meeting new people. To be civil, even kind. But don't assume that means you know what I'm like. Also, don't assume you want to know all of the real me right off the bat. That is definitely not the way for me to win friends and influence people.*

I don't think the friends-in-time approach is necessarily better than the friends-at-first-sight mentality. They are just different. And for me, the friends-in-time approach works. My friends are definitely amazing!

*Not that I am a horrible person. As far as humans go, I'm pretty decent. I try to do the right thing, I try to care about other people and not just myself, I work to be honest, and I find myself hilarious sometimes. But I also get massively frustrated at things that make no sense to my brain, and the shenanigans of this planet!!! Also, I'm tired almost all the time, and as mentioned before, being social with strangers stresses me out. I've got my crazy. So do you.

When I was a kid...

When I was a kid, we'd do wheelbarrow races, the ones where you hold the partner's legs and they have to go around on their hands. I haven't done one of those in ages, or even seen anyone do them, and it just randomly popped into my head, the memory of doing those. 

Also, sticker albums. I can see it, the pink pages and I have a vague idea of the design of the pages, but not super clear. And you'd stick all your stickers in there: scratch-n-sniff, puffy, everything in between. Pages of stickers. 

Also, Duck Hunt. I was SO good at Duck Hunt. I couldn't play Mario Brothers worth a darn, but I was super good at Duck Hunt. It was the summer trips to my uncle's and while he was at work, we were at home playing video games. That's as close as I ever got to being a gamer. 

Sometimes it's nice to remember the little things from childhood. 

Random things

 I have lived in this city for 6 years, and it was only this week that I discovered that there is a thing called the 9x9x9. Everyone meets up every Thursday at 9th and 9th at 9:00 on their bikes, and then they go for a bike ride all around town. No idea if it's the same route every time. But it was a LOT of bike riders (and skateboards, etc. Pick your pedestrian vehicle), like over 15 minutes worth. No idea how long this has been a thing, but it's a thing. 

A couple of weeks ago, my friend and I had an unexpected guest for lunch. It was a bird. We named him George. George did not like my food, he only liked my friend's. And, he did stand on the table. But he's a bird.

Why does my dishwasher play a song when it's done? No, seriously. It's a song. And I don't understand who it was that was like, "You know, my dishwasher is nice, but what it really needs is to also play a song like an ice cream truck when it's done washing the dishes." A beep? Okay, fine. Maybe a chime? A short one? But this was like a full-on song. And I just don't understand why that was a design feature someone thought would be great. 

Someone needs to come up with a way to make the whole watermelon taste as beautiful as the dead center of the watermelon. 

I'm really munchy lately. I just want to snack, but nothing is really hitting the spot. Food shouldn't be this hard. Someone tell me what to eat! Or maybe develop an app that will just know what it is I want to eat, without me having to know anything about what I want to eat. Or is that maybe just a little to demanding? Probably, yeah. 

Lessons from moving

1. I have too much stuff

2. At the same time, I don't have enough stuff? Mostly, like, shelves and that sort of thing for all of the too much stuff I do have?

3. Weirdly, the storage systems I had before don't work now. Even when it isn't a question of too much stuff. Which just seems rude.

4. Apparently living on the north side of the building is much cooler (temperature-wise) than living on the south side of the building.

5. Brand new appliances have some smells the first time you use them. That new appliance smell. 

6. Yoga mats do not actually offer a lot of padding. 

7. Back to the whole storage thing? Why on earth did I sit so long in my last apartment without getting more shelving? For realsies!

8. For having too much stuff, I still feel like I'm missing stuff. How is that even possible?

9. It's not just a new place. I have to figure out new routines. I mean, I literally moved 50 feet, so not major new routines, but still, new routines. 

10. I like vacuuming much more than mopping. 

Really?

I saw an ad a while back and was just a bit disappointed in humanity. I don't remember what the product was, the but tag line was: "Worship yourself. The world will follow."

Am I the only one that finds this, well, awful? Don't get me wrong. I'm all for a healthy sense of self-worth. And confidence. Those are both good things. But this seems like something way beyond that. 

Now, maybe it's just my introversion speaking. The idea of having the world follow me in any way, shape, or form, is incredibly unappealing.

Or maybe I've just had some bad experiences with people who were narcissistic and all about the self-worship. It never ended well for me or the people I cared about. In my experience, such a thing can only end in tears. 

Maybe I just am too aware of my flaws as a human being. I can say with absolute one-million-percent confidence that NO ONE should worship me. Ever. If I can just manage to be a decent human being for more then 10 minutes at a time, I feel like I'm winning the lottery. Earning someone's respect is an honor above honors. I just don't see why I need worship. Ick. Yuck. Blech. Please, no.

And given the fact that I can't even remember the product, clearly I wasn't their target consumer, so I guess we're all good. I didn't need what they were selling, and they weren't trying to sell to me. But I do hope that no one will be disappointed when I don't join the world in worshipping them. 

Surreality

I don't know how COVID things are going where you are* but in my neck of the woods, it looks like last April or May. You know, back in the days when people were still not sure if they were supposed to wear a mask or not? Kind of like right now, when people aren't sure if they are supposed to wear a mask or not, ha ha. 

And there are a lot of 'firsts' going on as people in my area are starting to do pre-pandemic things again. It is all a little surreal in some ways, as I do things that feel completely normal and then have the, "Oh, yeah" moment. 

Like going to Church. I have been doing this every Sunday since I was born. Then there was the pandemic, and we weren't meeting in person, and now we're back to meeting in person and it feels so normal. I'm seeing my Church friends in person again and we're picking up where we left off, but then there's the little tell-tale sign: talking about getting vaccinated, or not doing something because of COVID, or what have you. Or there are the little moments when I remember that I haven't seen such-and-such a person in over a year! 

There's other things, too. Hugs and handshakes. Going into a store and reaching for a mask and realizing I probably don't need to wear it (I still do most of the time, because I'm just not sure). There's the headline in my newsfeed announcing COVID cases. That used to automatically appear in my google newsfeed. Now, not so much. I have to look for it usually. Even the algorithm is in post-pandemic mode.

All of which makes for an interesting time, but the thing I find most interesting is how quickly we've all moved on--at least, in my neighborhood. So much of the surface of life is just back to normal. And maybe it's just my brain that adjusts so quickly, but I have these conversations where I hark back to the beginning of the pandemic and it feels so distant and removed. We talked about alternative work schedules after going back into the office, and I knew that once I get into the routine of the office, I won't want to work from home. Again it may just be me, but the adjustment to COVID life? On a surface level, it was just so rapid. And adjusting back? We quickly forget. While also deeply remembering, especially those of us who lost loved ones. 

And it's the deep remembering that I worry about for me. It took a long time for me to really feel the impact of the pandemic on myself in a recognizable way. And now that we are adjusting again, I'll quickly adapt on the surface, but if I'm not careful, in a year I may find myself struggling only to realize that that adjustment also took its toll. For some of us, it will be a much quicker realization, with immediate effects. For others, it may seem fine until weeks or months in. 

And so we need to give each other the grace to not always be okay. We need to watch out for each other and remember that even though on the surface, we're back to work and back to life, we are on that deep level not all okay. This isn't a new lesson, and it's not something that is only applicable after pandemics or serious global suffering, not at all. It's just an opportunity to get better at it on an individual level, since everyone has been impacted by the same thing. And so the message is: moving forward, remember that we all need space to have that deep recovery from the last year and a half. And that even though it was a shared experience, it was also deeply personal and unique for each one of us. So, remember to be kind. 

*Or when you are. If you are reading this a year from now, I sincerely hope COVID is really the past. And if you are reading it 50 years from now, I DEFINITELY hope it's not a thing. Still. Or again.

Bad PowerPoints

I was talking to a coworker this week about the worst presentations I've ever seen and realized that I very weirdly* have a top 3 worst PowerPoint presentations I've ever seen, hands down. So, not that anyone will ever care, but here they are:

The third worst PowerPoint presentation I've ever sat through:

To be fair to the presenter, this was back when I was in college, which was the early days of PowerPoint, so no one really knew what they were doing. And it was before all the tools like blackboard or what have you, where professors could post stuff online for their class. That is why it is only the third worst and I feel quite forgiving.

The PowerPoint was the history lecture for a class on Chinese history in the thousands BC. And the professor was really trying hard to adopt this cool new technology. But the slides--yikes! Crammed with text! I mean, forget margins, every pixel was covered in text. And then, the professor read the slides to us. Which, as a literate college student was quite agonizing. I just wanted to say, "Email the slides to me and I'll study them at home in my pjs." Which would have been great, because the slides would have been phenomenal for studying for the exams. 

Second worst PowerPoint presentation:

This was a presentation on customer service, based on the Disney customer service training. And, again, I will caveat this with the fact that I already had a chip on my shoulder because I don't work at a theme park, so doing theme park customer service seemed absurd. I mean, I work in archives, which are about as far as you can get from a theme park.** But, my real frustration with the presentation was that every slide was a pithy little quote that when you really thought about it critically... well, let's just say that rarely have so many words come together to create so little meaning. Outside of bills passed in congress, which I don't know that bills lack meaning so much as they require an interpreter, but I digress. 

These were quotes that you would find on kitschy signs and pillows and stuff, and I just read them and kept breaking them down and they were just absurd. And didn't necessarily have a lot to do with customer service or what the presenter was discussing, so much as just trying to be cutesie sayings in a presentation. 

But the worst PowerPoint presentation, hands down, was a presentation at a professional conference. Now, the presenter was young, so maybe that was part of it. And maybe they were nervous being brand new in the field and presenting to more experienced people. Or maybe that is just how they learned to do presentations (it wouldn't surprise me). 

Anyway, the presenter built the presentation by describing the archival process/project she was discussing in terms of Saved by the Bell. And there were about 75 slides that were all just images from pop culture. About 10 slides in, the entire audience was busy googling the references they didn't get on their phones, which is not the desired outcome for a presenter. But, even worse, the presentation involved a lot of details that really would have benefitted from diagrams and flowcharts and that sort of thing. It was just a mess. 

So, I don't know that there's a takeaway, other than I'm really judgy about PowerPoint presentations, but now I'm super curious to know what can beat my worst presentations (I know there's something out there). And that's all, really.

*I think it's weird? Maybe not? 

**I guess being a warlord or a serial killer might actually be the farthest, but you know what I mean. I don't work at a place where people come for recreation. Unless they are way into records. Which, some people are and there is nothing wrong with that at all! 

Football, pshaw

A couple of weeks ago, my nephew (in-law) introduced me and my nieces to Slapfight, which more or less exactly what it sounds like. In this Russian/Polish sport--there are world championships, and if there's a world championship, surely it must be a sport, right?--two people take turns slapping each other. Yes. This is a thing.

Of course, the discovery of the sport of slapfight led to internet searches on strange and obscure sports, which I don't need to list here, because if you are reading this, you most likely have the internet and can do your own searches. And some of them are legitimately athletic, like Takraw. Talk about skill and athleticism! And underwater hockey probably takes a bit of athletic ability. But a lot of them are just, well, goofy. 

Like extreme ironing. There are extreme ironing world championships. And a Facebook page. And a documentary. Now, some of the participants are really missing the extreme part of extreme ironing, but others--yeah. Waterskiing while ironing? I think that counts. 

Other favorites are unicycle hockey, cardboard tube dueling*, ferret legging, shin kicking, hobbyhorsing, the giant pumpkin regatta, cheese rolling, toe wrestling, crokinole, pillow fighting**, cycleball, and slamball.***

Now, here's where the fun comes. As my nephew pointed out, most of these are sports that, within 10 seconds, we are all experts. If you are looking for a fun and cheap activity, here's what you do. Find videos of some of these strange sports. Find a friend or significant other or sibling or whatever. Watch the with absolutely NO comprehension of what the rules are (no cheating and looking up the rules online first) and no sound on and commentate as you go. Lean into it! 

For example, we did this with crokinole, which looks like it is flick checkers (you try to flick checkers to some spot on the board? Or past some spot? Or through a certain spot? No clue). Per us, you aren't even allowed to learn crokinole until you are 35, but there is an obscure exception where if you are the only descendant of crokinole players who have all died while playing crokinole, you can learn sooner. Which was relevant because the everyone at the tournament (including spectators) appeared to be over 35, except one of the players. Also, this explains why so many people in the US don't run for president. To run, they would have to confirm they are 35 and then they would be hounded by crokinole players to learn to play.**** 

And who knows? If we all take up this little activity, maybe improv commentating can become a sport, too!

*I know, we've all done this. But not as members of the Cardboard Tube Fighting League. 

**Yep, there's a pillow fight league.

***Basketball on a trampoline court

****To all crokinole players: My apologies if it feels like we were making fun. In reality, it looks like an interesting game and I support anyone who is learning, wants to learn, or plays. And anyone who can play ANYTHING at any kind of a professional level is admirable in my view, because I will never be that good at anything. So, kudos to you!

Updates

In the past two weeks, it seems like all my tech has updated to new operating systems. And, I do not like it, Sam-I-Am!!!

The biggest change--and the one I'm most annoyed at--is that I can no longer close selected apps. It's all or nothing, baby. Not being (ever) an all-or-nothing kind of girl, this chafes my personality. But also, it's legitimately a pain. Sometimes, I want to close one or two apps, but keep a third open because it's something I'm going to come back to. And, having to close all or nothing seems massively inefficient and/or battery draining to my non-science-y-teched-out-but-still-pretty-rational brain. And I just really want to know who it was that was griping about this problem. Who is it that was getting super annoyed by having the option to close individual apps OR all of them? It seems like a problem that didn't really need a fix.

And this is why people hate change. Well, one of the reasons. So often updates seem to fix problems that didn't exist and exacerbate problems that did, or create problems that didn't exist. Is this some kind of job security strategy on the part of software engineers? Because it's really not working out for me so well, and I'd like to figure out a new plan. 

Don't get me wrong. I know that change is important. Change helps us become better people, it helps us do better things for each other and the planet. And it is definitely part of life. Spend 5 minutes on this planet, and you are going to deal with change that just happens because it does. (Sorry, dear little new babies). 

But, we really don't need to go creating change just to have change and for no other reason (hear that, CEOs, execs, and managers?). And, can we really try not to make change that makes things worse? I promise--there WILL be jobs in the future, it's going to be okay. And, if you are just someone with a short "change attention span" who needs to switch things up constantly, move your furniture around. Or dye your hair. Paint your nails! Sit on the floor at work!!! There are so many ways without making me have to learn my device again practically from scratch for no apparent reason other than someone somewhere got bored. (Boredom--a definite nemesis).

And now, my rant is over. At least for you. I make no promises for anywhere else. 

Unmasking

Yesterday I went for a walk and for reasons I can't produce now, I decided not to wear a mask. Now, before you panic, yes, I have been vaccinated. Also, my state has removed the mask requirement outdoors if you are vaccinated. (Heck, I think my state has removed all of the restrictions in place due to COVID. I'm not entirely sure. It's like, once we hit the one-year mark and people were getting vaccinated, everyone kind of forgot it was a thing and I'm not seeing updates on it anymore. Ah, the human memory--so short lived!!)

I've mostly still been wearing a mask around, just because I take the "let's just all wear a mask until none of us really have to anymore" approach. This approach is based on my life experience with exceptions: once you make exceptions or try to have too many categories, you might as well give up. But also, a lot of the places I'm going are still enforcing mask rules, so why not just keep living the masked up life? Easier than trying to remember if I need one or not.

But yesterday, I was walking outside, not going indoors anywhere, and I was heading to an area where I knew I would be able to keep my distance from people. Even so, I just felt really weird walking around without a mask. 

It was nice. I mean, It was lovely to not have a mask on. But, yes, it was also super strange. And more and more I run into people who aren't wearing masks--no judgment!! It mostly just makes me unsure what the rules are these days. But, hey, guys! This is what the end looks like!!* Yes indeedy, there will come a time when the pandemic really is a thing of the past. Woohoo!

*we hope. Knock on wood. I mean, there could be another India scenario, but it really seems unlikely, so I'm going to be optimistic. Why not? 

The street where you could live?

One of my ice breaker questions that I've never had a real answer to is "If you could name a street, what would you name it?" Fun question, but I haven't really known. 

Until now. My niece and I were talking about street names because we were driving through a neighborhood with streets named after fancy US universities which of course made us wonder why they chose those names. And then it kind of blurred into streets with names of people, we think. And so I asked my icebreaker.

She pitched the idea of numerical streets, but like, something mathematical, and it hit me that Infinity would be an AMAZING street name. Using the infinity symbol, of course (per my niece). And then we thought you could have a whole mathematical neighborhood, which would be awesome. I mean, I've seen planet neighborhoods, so why not math stuff?

Then we came up with a neighborhood with the periodic table of elements, which would also be cool. You could have some really fun street names that way. And geological-themed neighborhoods. We decided anatomy wouldn't be the best subject matter (it could get gross pretty quick), but you could do the genus/species thing from biology. There is a huge dearth of STEM-based street names, guys. 

So, now I have several ideas for what I'd name a street, and maybe you have some new ones, too! 

Post-pandemic life

I know the pandemic has had different impacts on everyone. I didn't feel like I struggled with the isolation as much as some. I like people, but also find them overwhelming (yep, it's a thing. It happens. It's fine). It wasn't until this March that I first thought, "Yeah. I won't mind going back to the office."* 

Naturally, going back will be an adjustment, but if there's one thing I learned from this pandemic (and life in general), it's that we adjust way quicker than we think we will. It'll be routine before I know it. 

I'm not looking forward to a work schedule, and there's definitely less flexibility when working in the office in terms of work hours. But, there are some things that are going to be definite improvements:

• An eating schedule!!! Because I can't just snack all day long in the office. Like, seriously, I can't. I work in an archive and food and records don't mix, so it's just not an option.
• Going to lunch! I have really missed lunch with coworker friends. Because, eating alone is just super boring, and having the social element to lunch just makes it better. I"m really hoping that my eating life takes a turn for the better. 
• Being able to go and talk to a colleague face-to-face instead of having to have an email or chat conversation. I'm SO stoked for that. 
• Not staring at a computer screen all day long! There will still be plenty of screentime, but in the office, I do a lot of work with paper records. And it's super nice.
• Another advantage of paper records is that often they are so much faster. You just can't skim through scanned images as fast as the physical items. I just wanna feel paper again!
• No masks!! I know this is a ways out, and I do love my sloth mask, but It will be nice to drop that accessory. Eventually. 
• Fewer spam calls?!?!?! I know for a fact that I never got this many spam calls when I was working in the office. One day, working from home, I got ten in one day! That's just too much. I'm really hoping...
• Good by couch! I like my couch, but honestly, I'm tired of sitting on it all day every day. I do go for regular walks, but still. It will be nice to change it up.
• Physical activity. I move around SO much more at the office. I have to run and get supplies, or go put this collection in storage, or get it out of storage, or run downstairs to check something, or walk home for lunch, or go ask a coworker a question. Which just doesn't have to happen at home.
• People. I really do like my coworkers. Like I say, I like people. Even if they do sometimes stress me out. But it will be nice to see my peeps again.

So it won't be all bad. I'll definitely miss some things, and I'll be totally socially awkward. But, it will pass and all these good things will help.

*If I thought the universe revolved around me that much, I'd apologize for making this drag on so long until I was ready to end it. But, quite frankly, the universe doesn't cater to me that much. 

A girl and her crayons

For Christmas, my sister-in-law and her family, remembering that I'd said I'd always wanted the 64-pack of crayons as a kid, gave me a 152 set of Crayola crayons. Which was AMAZING!!! I have glitter crayons, and metallic crayons, and lots of pinks--so many pinks. Interestingly, not so many yellows. Which I kind of get. Yellow is tricky--too much in either direction and you get into oranges and greens. Still, I'm in favor of more yellows. 

Having so many crayons, I needed something to break them in with, like a coloring book. I have, in the past, had one of those adult coloring books. And it was just too much. There is way too much detail and I just don't have time for that. I mean, seriously! That takes way too much planning and effort to figure out the themes and what is going to be what and yikes! 

So, I bought a "Sloths love Llamas" coloring book. Which is designed for kids. Which, I am in so many ways, so it's fine. And I LOVE my coloring book and crayons. I have found that coloring during virtual meetings helps me stay more focused because I'm not touching the computer and being tempted to look things up on the web. 

Clearly, I'm going to have to adapt when virtual meetings go the way of the world, but in the meantime, I just really like coloring. 

The unmade blogpost

One of my favorite podcasts--nope, let's be honest. It's my favorite, hands down, no competition--is the Unmade Podcast. If you need something fun and uplifting and hilarious in your life, this is the podcast to go to.*

The premise of the podcast is the hosts generate podcast ideas, but don't actually make the podcasts. That's the idea, but usually the ideas are sandwiched between them being hilarious and goofing off and riffing on the ideas and spoon of the week and all the other things they've added in. It's a perfect mix. 

Today, while I was cleaning out a notebook, I came across a list of blogpost ideas I'd come up with but have never written and they are mostly focused on 2020, so no real point in writing them now, but I still like the ideas, so I'm going to do an unmade blogposts for you:

• First world problems: A privilege
• Dante's (revised) circles of hell: car shopping**
• Ratings--overrated (I hate ratings. I hate rating things, I hate sorting through ratings, there's a whole rant just waiting here)
• 2020: Worst Prank Ever 
• Apocalypse: No Zombies Required (referring to 2020, which for many people felt apocalyptic. And I get it)
• Penguins in museums. It's 2020, why not? (Because I love penguins, they are amazing, and penguins in museums, hilarious, and it was 2020, and things were weird, so yeah. Of course there are going to be penguins in museums)

Who knows, maybe at some point I will get around to writing some of these (probably not the 2020 ones, though). But, for now, just enjoy imagining what they would have been.

*Nope. Not on commission.
**I have long thought of doing a version of Dante's inferno for archivists, meaning things that archivists would consign you to a circle of Dante's inferno for.

Happy New Year!

Good news! It's a new year! Well, at least it is if you are Persian or celebrate Norwuz*. So if 2021 isn't working out for you, and the Chinese New Year in February didn't improve things, try rebooting** and celebrating Norwuz!

And if Norwuz doesn't work, you can try Ugadi (a new year celebrated in some states in India, celebrated at the same time as Gudi Padwa and Cheti Chand, which are other Indian new years) or Navreh (a Kashmiri new year, so also India) next month. And a bunch of other Indian cultures celebrate their new year in April. There is also Sri Lanka's national new year, and Malaysia celebrates a new year somewhere in there, and Bangladesh.

And if 2021 still isn't up to snuff, the Serer people in Africa celebrate their new year in June. And so do the Dogon people, also in Africa.

Then there's Muharram, the Islamic new year celebration, starting on August 31st this year, and the Coptic new year in September, and the Ethiopian new year at the same time. And it looks like a bunch more Indian cultures have new years scattered through the fall. And Rosh Hoshanah, the Jewish new year, in early September.

And if 2021 really just isn't doing it for you, I guess you can end it early with Quviasukvik***, the Inuit, Aleut, and Yupik new year, which is held in December.

What do we learn from all of this? Well, first, we learn that calendars are just pretend****. But as long as we all keep believing, it will be fine. 

Then we learn that maybe January 1st isn't the only time to celebrate a new beginning and to try to improve. Because new beginnings are happening all the time, everywhere! So, feel free to declare your own personal new year any time you want. 

And, we also learn that it is super fun to live in a world where we celebrate the new year in different ways--and at different times! That is so cool! Hooray! 

*As long as Wikipedia isn't lying to me. Which goes for all the other new years listed here. 

**I just really love the idea of rebooting the year. 

***It seems like you should be able to say it in order to celebrate it. I don't make the rules, but that does seem like a good one. 

****In so many ways, time is just made up. Not the passage of 'time'--we get older, the earth does move around the sun, etc. But hours and minutes and days and deadlines and stuff. In a lot of ways, they are just made up.

Icebreakers for kids

What if the floor was made of bananas?

What if you had shoes that made the ground lava?

What if you could only sing?

What if buildings were made of peanuts?

What if you had a (fill in the blank, but obviously it has to be a non-typical animal) for a pet?

What if you mixed [insert 2 animals] together?

What if one of your toys became the real thing?

What if you had a feature of a different animal every day, like Imogene in Imogene's Antlers?

What if you lived on the moon? 

What if you lived in a tree? (I'm very curious what their treehouses would entail)

What would be the best dinosaur to have in the army? (Or as a firefighter, etc.)

What if a dragon breathed [insert something other than fire]?

Have nots

 I've been thinking lately about all the things that have not happened in my life. For example, I haven't:

• lived in a war-torn country where things are constantly being bombed
• experienced severe famine where I didn't have food to eat
• gone hungry for lack of food
• had my possessions destroyed in fire, flood, or other natural disasters
• been homeless
• lived somewhere where I was afraid of what the government might do
• been imprisoned, justly or unjustly
• been through a divorce 
• lost a child or spouse or parent
• been assaulted

And those are just some of my have-nots. Not to say I haven't had some hard haves, but all in all, I feel like my life is pretty fortunate. 

And now I'm going to go knock on wood. 

Bird Refuge

 

Reactions

Lately, I feel like there have been a lot of reaction-provoking headlines in my news feed. Not my regular eye-rolling and head-shaking reactions, or "good to know" reactions--the kind of reactions I usually have to pandemic news or politics/world events. But snarky, inner-monologue reactions. Which, admittedly, I always have, but lately I've just been really aware of them. So, I present you with just a sample: 

"Is it worth tracking your carbon footprint?"

That sounds exhausting. Like, seriously. Not that I don't care about the environment, but I'm not sure me being insane will actually help matters.

"She came to the U.S. with only $300 and worked housekeeping jobs to pay for school. Now she's a flight director for NASA's Mars Perseverance."

That is so fantastic. Good for her. But, we do realize that this is an outlier story? 

"COVID-19: US high school band students rehearse in individual bubbles"

A bubble sounds kind of cool. But, playing an instrument in a small personal bubble? That sounds like a great way to pass out.

"China celebrates colourful Lantern Festival"

I could go for a colorful lantern festival. Yeah, totally. Bring on colorful lanterns!

"Frasier and Rugrats both set to return to TV"
Because we need more reboots? Or revivals? Or whatever? Who was begging for this?

"Cancer survivor joins first all-civilian space mission"
I mean, cool, but if I was an astronaut, I think I'd feel super frustrated. I train and train and get specialized knowledge, and now just any old person can do my job? That seems a little less cool.

"Texas train carrying fuel in flames after crossing collision"
Yikes. I like a good explosion as much as the next guy, but really? I feel like maybe Texas didn't need this right now. And the driver--s/he never needed it. 

"The Real Congress Is Kinder, Gentler Than What You See on TV"

That's good. But I would really appreciate more kindness on TV, too. I mean, why not? 

"How 30,000 elephant 'selfies' will help in conservation"

Wow! Selfies that might be useful!

"New fleece of life for Australian sheep with 35kg coat of wool"

That is SO MUCH FLEECE. 

If archivists could time travel

Most people, if they could time travel, would go back and buy stock in a successful company or kill Hitler, or otherwise try to right some wrong. Or they would be terrified to interfere at all, I guess. 

But if archivists went back in time, we wouldn't do any of that. We'd just go back and tell people to write dates on things.* Or to label their photos. Or to actually write stuff down! Or to keep things!

Scene: Eliza Hamilton is getting ready to burn all her letters. Fwoosh, a time traveler appears. "Eliza, wait! Don't do it! That is an important historical record and someday everyone is going to want to know what is in here!"

Okay, in fairness, I actually kind of support Eliza Hamilton burning her letters. They were her business, and she has a right to her privacy. So, bad example. But in the case of my however-many-greats-grandfather, I would definitely do some intervention. Like, get the guy to write down who his parents were, and his wife's name (with the right spelling, because we aren't sure and that's really causing problems). 

Scene: Joseph, probably out working on a farm? Fwoosh, time-traveling archivist (myself). "Joseph, what's up? I've got some paper here, I just have a couple of questions. Who are your parents? Excellent. Oh, I can meet them? Great. Siblings? Perfect. And your wife, is she around? Okay, great. Let's just write down all this info, and keep it safe so I can find it in a couple hundred years. Yeah, that will be nice."

The Spaniards who burned Aztec records? Definitely visiting them. The millions and millions of old photos of who knows who? Fix that. Maybe pop by and put a word in with Madison and his buddies to clarify some of the punctuation in the Constitution (can you imagine if all of the confusion around the 2nd amendment is really an ink drop or something?).  

Not to say that stopping Hitler isn't a noble cause or anything. I get it. But if I get access to a time machine, I'll be fixing the historical record.** You're welcome.

Getting shuteye

For the last couple of weeks, I just haven't been sleeping well. Okay, let's be real. It's way more like several years, but the last couple of weeks have been worse than usual. I feel like my brain has completely forgotten how this sleep thing is supposed to work. Instead of shutting off, like I do with my computer each night, it seems to be going into sleep mode and not really shutting down. (Which is ironic, because sleep mode for my computer is definitely NOT the equivalent of a sleep mode for my brain). 

And today, for the first time in a couple of weeks, I had the chance to sleep in, and of course, I slept in later than I had planned on because it just felt so good. As a side note, why is my bed always the most comfortable just before I'm supposed to wake up? And why do I always sleep best in between my alarm and the snooze alarm? 

Clearly, my sleep habits need reform. It's a constant series of failed attempts, but I live in hope. 

In the meantime, if anyone knows how to retrain my brain in what it means to sleep, do let me know. 

More Icebreakers

What would be the worst mascot ever? The best?

What are the three non-human things that you love more than anything in the world?

If you could pick one fictional thing from any movie, TV show, or book to be real, what would it be?

Name your house. 

What is the best kind of apple?

What trend (toy, clothes, etc.) would you bring back from your childhood, and what would you send into a blackhole?

Homesick

 

Last week, I was at the grocery store and lo and behold, there were paczkis! No, I am not Polish. And, no, I don't celebrate Lent (although, it probably wouldn't hurt to give up a few things and establish some new habits). 

No, I was just really excited because it reminded me of home. Well, my home before where I live now. Which, I have almost been away from as long as I lived there, but honestly, once a home, always a home. And that particular home is very treasured in my heart. 

Ridiculously, I did not buy the paczkis, because I had another treat in my cart and was trying to at least pretend that I am a semi-responsible adult who knows how to make healthy food choices. And when I was at the store today, were there any paczkis? No. Of course not. But, it is a bit early in the season, and it was a Saturday evening, so I"m going to be optimistic that maybe I can find them on another trip. And even if I don't, I'm not too fussed, because really, it was just seeing a piece of home that I needed. Having a bite would just be the icing on the cake. 

Inner children

When my 4-year old nephew is unhappy about something, he clenches his fists and shrugs his shoulders and huffs "Humph" and has this adorable frowny face (which really just makes you want to hug him and make him smile, but he doesn't actually want that. Even 4-year olds deserve to have their feelings acknowledged). And sometimes, he will punch the seat of the couch. 

And, can I be honest? Sometimes I have an inner-self that feels just like that (or worse! I feel like punching the couch multiple times!). And I'm just so glad that now when I am feeling that frustrated, I can picture my nephew and visualize maybe a little of that frustration right on out of myself. 

Although, I'm not nearly as adorable as my nephew. 

Very much a first world problem

Why does civilization involve so much paperwork and upkeep and maintenance?

I was thinking about this because so much of my life seems to go to organizing piles of paper, weeding through stuff, and cleaning. 

I think the cleaning part probably transcends civilization. Maybe just a difference in scale. But there are so many piles of paper in my life. And so much stuff! Endless things. And as soon as you clear some out, more come creeping into your life. 

It seems to me that we "civilized" people might be doing something wrong. We invent stuff, which makes us civilized (or so it seems), and then we spend all of our time dealing with the stuff. And the paperwork generated by civilization--endless receipts and legal documents and insurance papers, and on and on.

I'm not saying that the lack of civilization is preferable. I love indoor plumbing, modern medicine, and not living in a cave or what have you. There are definitely some perks to human progress. But, I think maybe we mistook progress for the end? Instead of a means? I mean, it's easy to do. Things and stuff are so attractive. 

Or maybe I'm the only one with this problem and I personally need to be wiser with my resources. Not going to lie, that is highly likely. But some days, it feels like my first-world country is really not interested in helping me out with that. 

Yep, definitely a first world problem. I'll go be grateful now. 

Something new

You know, the Christmas holidays are kind of a season for traditions. But, this Christmas season and this past week, I have done a lot of new things. Like: 

• turned a pencil. Out of lilac wood. Basically, I made a mechanical pencil. How to make a pencil: 1) have a lathe. 2) have an awesome brother-in-law who will walk you through the process. 
• visited Santa Fe. Finally! And, definitely need to go back. 
• tried halva, kunafa, foul (not the adjective, but a lovely middle eastern dish), and other new foods. I prefer the halva to the kunafa. Neither is bad, they were both good, I just like the halva more. 
• learned to pick a lock. As long as it is a clear lock where I can see the tumblers. I actually picked two of them but one felt more like luck. Look, I'm a novice. Basically, your locks are currently safe from me picking them. 
• played new games, including Fluxx, 6 Nimmt (with moosen), Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza, LLAMA (both the 3-year old round, which is ever-changing, and the actual game), and Ticket to Ride Nordic Countries, India, and Switzerland. And sort of Throw Throw Burrito, but it was a 2-person game and I think that is a different experience from a 3+ player game.
• played around with intentionally blurring nighttime photos. Way more entertaining than it sounds.
• played Paper Rock Scissors Freeze Tag. 
• opened Christmas crackers. 
• colored with crayons from a 152 count box. My dream come true!

Trying new things: give it a shot!