Reality

I just gotta say that our modern take on fairy tales has really filled us with some false beliefs. For example, birds? Not the nice friendly creatures we have been led to believe. Proof: I have been dive bombed by birds while running. This is not the action of a friendly, peace-loving species. I have never had a bird come in and sew a dress for me. Cinderella? Lies.

Another problem with Cinderella: Do you really think that someone is going to spend a whole night dancing with a person, and then not be able to recognize her face because she's wearing a different outfit? If that is the case, that guy was not really all that into her. Just sayin'. And the odds that a shoe will fit one foot and only one foot? Absurd. I feel like someone ought to give the Prince to tell his side of the story.

So, a few weeks ago, somewhat inspired by the absurd Olympic interviews I suppose, my niece and I were having hypothetical interviews with characters from books, movies, history, etc. And we envisioned how an interview with Cinderella would go:

Reporter: So, what did you think when you saw your fairy godmother?
Cinderella: Well, my first thought was I was hallucinating. I mean, who's ever heard of a fairy godmother? And I had served mushrooms for dinner, and you know how mushrooms can be...but then I figured, "Hey, even if it is a hallucination, this is a good thing. I'm going to go with it."

Reporter: You walk into the ball. You, Cinderella. You never dreamed of being in the palace, never thought this would actually be happening to you. What is going through your head at this moment?
Cinderella: Well, I walk in to the ballroom, and I'm looking around, and everything looks just amazing. And then I really start looking, and I start noticing spots on the railings, spills on the floor, handprints on tables... I did NOT envy the poor cleaning staff, let me tell you. To have to clean up after all those messy guests? What a nightmare! I was so relieved that I had to be out by midnight. Otherwise, I would have ended up helping them out. Poor souls."

Now, maybe you are rolling your eyes saying, yeah, that's not what Cinderella is going to be thinking about. But, when you have done something all day every day for a long time, you tend to notice that in other settings. Also, when you are in a strange place, you are going to look for something familiar. My prediction: Cinderella would be lint picking and trying to get rid of wrinkles in the Prince's suit. Which, of course, doesn't mean she couldn't have a fantastic conversation. But, my scenario isn't farfetched, either.

So, yeah. Fairy tales. Not exactly reality. But I suppose that's good, because reality is realistic enough for anyone. A break from it is nice every now and then.