Rights or Right?

The other day, on the way home from work, a passenger on the bus dropped his hat and another passenger picked it up and ran to the door of the bus to give it to passenger 1. I had been feeling a bit self-absorbed, tired, and a bit unfriendly towards the world at large, and hadn't felt overly favorable to my fellow riders. Not that I'd been rude or anything, more that I just ignored them. But I had 'summed them up', I guess you could say. I wasn't necessarily judging them or anything, because I really wasn't invested enough to form an opinion. But I did survey them as I got on the bus and found my corner to hermit up in.

Anyway, when passenger two returned the hat, I was shaken from my self-indulgent stupor. I kept feeling like I should be doing something to help, but it doesn't really take that many people to return a hat. And the first passenger thanked him, I saw a totally different passenger one from the one I had summed up previously. I had observed certain things, and wondered about them in the context of my own experience, and then dismissed it all from my mind, but that small, insignificant interaction gave me a chance to see beyond the surface and shift from the immune human being on a bus to a participant in humanity, and I was incredibly grateful for the experience.

Now, don't get me wrong. I'm not a callous person, I try very hard not to limit people to what I can gather from a brief glimpse of them on a bus (hardly a reliable way to learn someone's character!). I'm a normal human being who is trying her best to do some good in the world, and I'm not saying that you should run out and meet everyone on the bus or anything. What stood out to me about this incident was what a difference kindness makes in how we perceive each other, and how we feel about each other.

That same day, I had listened to a podcast, a debate that centered around freedom of speech and our right to said freedom. And as I listened, I just kept feeling dismayed at how much more concern everyone feels about their rights than they do about doing what is right--what is right being what is kind, what is respectful, what shows understanding and courtesy towards someone else whether we agree or not. Basically, what is right being the golden rule (a very undervalued principle!).

I read headlines and I feel like there is so much anger everywhere, people all fighting for a piece of some non-existent pie, everyone being against everyone else, loud voices, defensiveness, and just so much anger. I'm not qualified to give an opinion on whether the anger is justified or anything. There are a lot of problems in the world, there's a lot of unfairness, and I feel like a little kid who doesn't know enough to handle big problems. But it does seem like a lot of the arguing and anger and discord stems from a world more concerned about getting their own than trying to treat other people the way they deserve. And I think of that act of kindness. One person tried to be kind, and suddenly the strangers involved became real. I saw myself in them--my desire to make others smile, to help others. One of them reminded me of my dad. I was reminded of my own gratitude when people do small things to help. When you see yourself in others, it is hard to feel indifferent to them. It's the golden rule at work.

So what is my point? I don't know if I know. But I think of that debate about freedom of speech, and the people arguing that they should be able to say whatever they want, whenever they want, with impunity. Well, maybe you'll think I'm naive, but it seems to me that if we stopped worrying so much about what we are legally entitled to say or do, and thought more about whether we ought to say or do it--whether it is the right thing to do, even if we have a right to do it--the world might run just a little more smoothly. What say we go be kind?