Who asked for this?

On Monday, I got a text from "Ashley Brooks." Who is Ashley Brooks, you ask, that I should mention her? (I guess it could be a him, although then I would seriously question whether it was 1926 instead of 2026). 

Ashley is a virtual assistant at the dealership where I bought my car. Now, I actually appreciate that someone from the dealership texts to remind me of my routine maintenance. Very helpful. And usually an actual person.

Ashley, though? Do we not all have our hands full trying to deal with actual people, without also being hounded by fake ones? Do we really need the virtual Ashley's trying to sell us stuff, to spam our inboxes? WHO ASKED FOR THIS????

Answer: No one. No one asked for this. At least, no normal person. I don't know a single person (and like all people, I know some very odd ducks. And am surely the odd duck in someone's world) who was walking around saying, "You know, the junk mail from the Post Office, that was alright. But not quite enough. And spam emails, those are great. They have definitely improved my quality of life. Social media spam has also kicked it up a notch. But I still feel like there's more life has to offer. I need more. I am not living my best spam life."

Anyway. Here we are. Silver lining? I don't have to feel bad about ignoring fictional people.