Misery's company

We always say "misery loves company" as though that is a bad thing. But this week, I realized that, yes, misery loves company, Because when we are miserable, when life is roughing us up, OF COURSE we want company to get through it!!

Now, I get that the usual understanding of "misery loves company" is that miserable people like others to be miserable too. But the actual definition of misery is "a state or feeling of great distress or discomfort of mind or body." I sure don't want to be alone when I feel that way. 

Wanting other people to also be miserable (definition: wretchedly unhappy or uncomfortable) isn't about the misery. It's about being mean and spiteful. So, a mean and spiteful person would want someone else to be miserable if they were. But they'd probably want someone else to be miserable even if they weren't. 

But when it is just misery at play, no. Misery does love company because it makes us feel less alone. It is reassuring. When it is with our loved ones,  it gives us a chance to let down our guard, be weak for a moment and let out the stress and woe and worry. And then we feel better able to move forward, because we're a little stronger because we aren't alone. 

So, yes, misery loves company. And that's okay.