So that happened

 Some fun and surprising headlines from the last year:

"Child tweets gibberish from US nuclear-agency account"  Um, yeah, that's not alarming at all.

"Canadian beavers chop down town's internet" Good to know the interwebs are so secure.

"Belgian farmer accidentally moves French border" It could happen to anyone, right? I'm sure he put it back.

"Josh fight: hundreds join friendly battle for naming rights" Because what else is there to do during a pandemic? 

"Humpback whale spits out lobsterman" Apparently, lobstermen are NOT delicious*

"World's tallest sandcastle build in Denmark" I've never really thought about building sandcastles in Denmark...

"The traffic patrol officer at this school is a chicken. And it wears a fluorescent vest" And we were worried about robots taking our jobs...

"Rhino Temporarily Escapes Enclosure at Omaha's Henry Doorly Zoo, Prompting Lockdown" Yes, I think lockdown is the appropriate response when a rhino is running around loose. 

"Escaped zebras spark double takes and denials in Maryland" Rhinos AND zebras? Apparently, it's not just people going stir crazy during the pandemic.

"Camels escape circus and wander Madrid streets" And why not. If I was in Madrid, I'd want to roam the streets.

"World conkers champions' celebration plans" First off, why don't we play conkers in the US? And yes, people, they deserve a championship, too.

"Motorcycle thief flees crime scene on tractor" Which seems to indicate that this crime did NOT go according to plan.

"Balloon World Cup: Gerard Pique organises first event" Yes, but how are they at Flippy-Floppy?**

"New Zealand City parts ways with its wizard" What?!?! Also, does my city have a wizard?

"Amazon parrot plays peekaboo with CCTV traffic camera" Which was probably the most entertainment the traffic guys had in a long time. 

"San Diego motorway frenzy after armoured van spills money" It's a cartoon/movie scene come to life!

"Pokemon Go: Police fired for chasing Snorlax instead of robbers" Ummmmm...I'm concerned.

"Search for monkey missing after US motorway crash" So many questions. 

Every headline with "Internet bashes/sides with/reacts/etc." First, this isn't a thing. Second, why do I care what internet users think? Third, why is any of this my business? (Answer: it's not). 

*Shout out to "We Don't Eat Our Classmates" by Ryan Higgins.
**Flippy-Floppy is the balloon game, but you wear socks on your hands. Long socks, so that the ends hang off and you have to hit the balloon with the empty sock part. It makes the balloon game much harder. 

An ideal world

The other day, I was having a conversation with some friends and we got on the topic of name mispronunciations and spellings. My name isn't a super common one*, so growing up I usually knew that it would get misprounounced.** And probably mispelled. But I never had to spell my last name, because back in the day, when you watched TV, you HAD to sit through commercials. And Reynolds Wrap had commercials and so everyone saw how Reynolds was spelled, and that made it pretty easy. People heard my name, and they knew how to spell it. 

And even if they didn't know how to spell my name, I could usually say, "like in Fur Elise, by Beethoven"*** and they knew what I was talking about. 

But not anymore. Fewer and fewer people know what the heck song I'm talking about, and no one is seeing Reynolds Wrap commercials, so now, I end up spelling out both my names. 

Anyway, we're having this conversation, and I'm lamenting the world where I have to spell my first and last name out, when I used to not have to do that, and not for the first time, I realized what a great world it would be if the problem I were discussing was really the worst thing going on.

And so, for all of you, I wish for a world where the worst problem we have to deal with is name misspellings. I totally want to live in that world. 

*Although, the number of people I meet who know someone with my name as either a first or middle name is really high. And I have a good friend with my name. But we spell it differently. There's like, 18 different ways to spell my name. But I claim that mine is the original--unless you can find a spelling that pre-dates Beethoven.

**Winner of mispronunciations: Elsie. Totally understandable. On my first day of junior high, I tallied how many teachers called me Elsie and how many called me Elise. I think it was 4-3. 

***Like I say, I have the original spelling.

Facial recognition

Just before the holidays, I was going through some photographs that my dad took during college (he studied photography). There was one of my sister that, when I saw it, just really made me think of her almost-5-year-old son. 

The interesting thing is that it wasn't a feature that made me match them together. Maybe the eyes, but even then, his eyes and her eyes, if you lined them up next to each other, wouldn't scream, "HEY! THIS KID STOLE YOUR EYES!!!" It was really more of the look in general in the photograph. I have seen that look in my mischievous little nephew many times.

I had the same experience with another child of that sister while there for the holidays. This particular child has always been confused with her younger sister, but there were a couple of times during the break that something about her expression and voice was so similar to her older sister. 

That's how this whole "match the child with the relative" thing works for me. Glimpses and glances and intonations.** A profile or a laugh or a gesture. I once went to an event where I heard a kid talking and knew immediately that he was my history teacher's son. Another time I read an article in a magazine and wondered if it was written by Jeffrey R. Holland. Turned out to be written by his son. 

And with my nieces and nephews, and even siblings, I do see certain facial features that are similar (the Reynolds nose and blue eyes), so we aren't dissimilar. But I also don't think we all look as alike as some people say we do (although there is that picture of me and my younger sister at her wedding. Yep, I saw that and kind of got why everyone always mixes me up with her). 

Every now and then, though, our kinship comes through loud and clear. I kind of like those moments. 

*Probably because 1) I'm not super great at picking apart people to identify which feature came from which parent/parent's side of the family and 2) it seems like once you get to know someone, they are just themselves. 

**In fairness, I feel like I sound like this sister for about a month after I come back from a visit. Although, I also feel like I sound like characters from Jane Austen books for about a week after I finish reading one.