What not to do

What is it about me that invites weird strangers to ask me out around public transportation? This is something that continues to baffle me, and I'd really like to know. (Maybe it's the fact that I use public transportation. Seriously, though, a person should be able to use public transit without being hit on).

I was riding the train home from running some errands the other day, and it happened yet again. There I was, thinking about eating an apple when I got home (not making eye contact, for the record), and a complete stranger asked me for my phone number. So, let me spell out how not to hit on a girl.

1. Public transit is NOT a dating service. The only thing that you can deduce with any certainty that 2 people on a train have in common is that the are riding that train. This is not sufficient commonality to think you'd have a good time together. So do NOT approach me to get my number. 

2. Do NOT ask me for my phone number when our encounter history includes 3 minutes on a train not talking or looking at each other, and you telling me I'm beautiful. You are a stranger and I, being an intelligent human being with more than half a brain, do NOT give my phone number to strangers on a train.

3. Do NOT tell me I'm beautiful and then ask me for my number when you don't know me. Maybe you think it's flattering to tell me I'm beautiful. You are wrong. If you are sincere, it simply means that all you are going for me due to my looks, which is not enough to make me believe you have any interest in me in my entirety. But, given that you are a stranger (I actually know Adam better than you), I'm skeptical about your sincerity, so it just doesn't come off well at all. So just don't even do it. Don't tell me I'm beautiful at any point in our conversation. You won't win points, at least not with me.

4. Do NOT tell me you are working 2 jobs and sending money to the folks in Mexico. While I admire that you are helping your family, and a hard worker, it would be really hard for me to have more earning power than my spouse. Honestly, it just reminds me of the days when I was getting hit on in the Dominican Republic all the time, because I was American and a passport to the U.S. So, no, it doesn't really help.

5. Do NOT keep asking for my phone number when I've told you no. The total number of times you should ask for my phone number is zero. Don't do it once, but especially don't keep doing it over and over. 

6. Do NOT get off at my stop and ask me for my number again. You interrupted me while listening to a book on the train and you have bombarded me with requests for my number. You seem to think there's a possibility that we could hit it off, which is kind of insulting to me, you've asked questions you have no business asking. So do the world a favor, and just don't even get off at my stop. 

If you want to break these rules, be my guest, but do it with someone else. Don't even try with me. It's not that I don't want to date and get married. I just know that my type doesn't include someone who would hit on people on public transit. So save us both some time and awkwardness, and let me think about my apple.